Day 74 - Humiliation prt.1
I realise, see and understand that in order to direct myself within the emotional experience of the word humiliation I first have to release the words as experience within through self forgiveness to bring the point back to self, taking responsibility for the experience within.
I see, realise and understand that no one but self is cause and origin of the experience within and that experiences are installed within oneself created by oneself and recreated by self over and over again.
I see, realise and understand that when participating within my world accessing the word humiliation as experience I'm automatically looking for the source of the experience within others that I just didn't yet allowed myself to look into within self to see where/how and where I did created myself as this word.
I see, realise and understand that it is an act of stupidity to believe that one can direct a point within a relationship when one is not yet understanding who one is within the words experienced within it, which thus will only lead to more conflict and friction within the relationship I'm participating within.
I realise that after one has taken the point back to self as self-responsibility through self forgiveness defusing the point within oneself, one can actually embark on directing self in the moments where the same point will emerge or when faced with the same point again.
I realise that I simple overlooked that this experience as feeling humiliated through others words/actions has been actually me not yet realising, seeing and understanding that it has been me who has been creating this experience as self in the first place because really how could I other wise even see it within me when it wouldn’t yet be an accepted part of me, which I rather just ignore, suppress and its only surfacing when participating in relationships through externalised judgment when being in a conflict.
I realise that when I experience: “shit here I find myself on the exact same spot again, nothing has changed”, that I simple missed, overlooked something, which is ‘who I am’ within it in the realisation that one can only be stuck in a point in and as the mind.